Dear Hotel Guests,
When you call seeking a rate quote, please have, at minimum, a
date range in mind. A week, a month, and if you can’t narrow it down to that, even a
season would also assist us in providing you with the most accurate estimate. A
room “oh, anytime really,” can vary by literally hundreds of dollars.
If you can’t figure out the month, season, or even year you want to be here, maybe
tell me why you want to come and I can use my fabled psychic abilities to
help you determine the most appropriate time for your visit.
You want to visit so you can complain that your favorite restaurant that you traveled here to eat at is closed? Must be January. Watch the leaves change color and fall off the trees and bemoan the nip in the air? Autumn will do you just fine. You want to lounge on the beach in 80 degree weather, but not have to deal with traffic all while paying hostel prices? I believe the month you want is called Imagin-ary.
And when the
moment comes when you decide to bite the bullet and make an actual real life
reservation, for an actual date in the future, for the sake of my sanity,
please provide me with said date.
We appreciate your patience and understanding as we try to
be patient and understanding with you, when it seems you can’t even understand
what you actually want.
Sincerely,
Friendly Neighborhood Desk Clerk
Loved it! Aren't people just too stupid for words? I would rather work at a kennel!
ReplyDeleteI would, too! At least there your guests don't talk back and when they do it's with a wagging tail.
ReplyDelete