Restroom facilities are limited to a 3-Holer on the back 40.

Dear Hotel Guests,

"Hi, do your hotel rooms come with bathrooms?" If you have to ask, it's my recommendation
that you shouldn't be traveling. What part of worldwide, high-class hotel chain says communal commodes to you?
Your questions are this insightful before you even arrive here, I truly look forward to what gems you will throw my way upon your arrival.

Sincerely,

Friendly Neighborhood Desk Clerk